“Honey, why don’t you drink a cold beer?” She says. My mind races behind the newspaper. What’s this? Did she crash the car? Go on one of those shopping trips with her sister? God forbid she booked us tickets to a musical? I placidly mull over her question with no outward signs of panic and measure my answer carefully. A non-committal grunt suffices. “It’s just that, you’ve been a real grouch lately,” she adds, “and you’re always a lot more in control of your stress levels after you’ve had a beer. Just one though. Maybe two. Do you know what I mean, sweetie?”

I don’t buy it. She didn’t come up with this idea on her own; she’s obviously heard this from a girlfriend who experienced the stress control truth with her own beau. I’ve been telling my sweet darling angel this very thing for a dozen years. But, of course, my opinions carry little weight compared to the biweekly, screeching, lunchtime margarita crew. A relaxing beer? Imagine that.

Prescription Drugs

Learning to control stress is something we could all use a hand in. Going to therapy is always an option, and nowadays, there’s absolutely no stigma attached to talking to a professional thought organizer. Beware of talking about such things to a regular medical doctor, though. The medical model is generally all about addressing the symptoms, rather than the underlying cause. A lot of doctors will recommend drug treatment, rather than refer you to a  psychotherapist, whether a psychiatrist or a psychologist.

Consult a Therapist

Many people don’t know the difference; a psychiatrist is a medical doctor with four years of residency training in mental health treatment, who can prescribe drugs. A psychologist is someone with a Master’s degree or Doctorate in the science of psychology, usually following a Bachelor’s degree in the same subject. There is a pronounced overlap between psychiatry and clinical psychology, but that’s the primary distinction.

Talk Things Out With a Close Friend

So what’s the difference between talking to a psychotherapist or talking things out with a close personal friend? When it comes to controlling stress; not much. The main difference is a professional will give an unbiased, considered, educated opinion about your condition, and can recommend tried and trusted techniques to improve your situation. A friend who knows you extremely well may also be capable of proffering a similarly effective opinion and solution, though obviously, it depends on the personal qualities and knowledge base of the individual.

Meditation

One of the techniques both a professional and a layman friend may recommend is meditation. There are many different types and techniques, but the common root is quiet contemplation and controlled breathing. The overriding goal is to achieve a higher state of awareness through advanced relaxation. Or to control stress; a more relaxed and peaceful mindset. Meditation is practiced in almost every religion, as well as secularly. It has been around for about as long as we have, which vouches for its legendary effectiveness. Some say you can meditate with a cold beer. I say it’s worth a try.

Here’s a guide on a simple breathing technique that can be used quickly when needed.

Click the link bellow to save it to your computer:

[download id="3"]

Audio recording of Susan Smith Jones’s interview

[podcast]http://www.takecontrolofstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/2009-09-nicklawrence.mp3[/podcast]

Susan’s work has made a profound difference in people’s lives. She has a unique ability to inspire and motivate in a way that makes you feel empowered and know that your health destiny is under your control. As a gift, Susan has put together a special discount for this 3-book set. For more information and to take advantage of this opportunity, follow this link or read the following brochures. Blissful Living Book Set, here’s a review Book Set Review (it’s a big file, give it time to load)

“Time was invented so that everything wouldn’t happen at once.”
Albert Einstein

Do you ever feel like you have way too much to do and not enough time to do it? Feeling

Overwhelmed by a “to do” list that seems like it will take more time than is available to you can lead to stress and sleepless nights.  Unfortunately the energy we expend on being stressed does nothing to help get anything done. In order to avoid the stress of “overwhelm” the first thing to do is to take a deep breath and look at things from a new perspective.

As I say in my book, Stop the Stress Habit: change your perceptions and improve your health, it is not the situation itself, but rather your perception of that situation that creates your stress. To avoid a stress reaction to an overwhelming amount of work or other time demands, it is necessary to change your perception of those demands. Easier said than done? Well, let’s take a look at where to start and how stressing over the situation never helps get things done.

Stressing over your workload or other commitments while you are commuting or all night when trying to sleep never makes any difference in the actual situation. Just thinking about work to be done and “stressing” about it does not minimize the workload, nor does it get the work completed. You may think the sense of urgency that is created helps you to work faster and stay focused. Some people say that stress is helpful in that way. However, losing sleep or getting sick because of the stress created by a large amount of work or too many demands on your time is not helpful.

If you believe stress motivates you, learn to differentiate the motivation for working from stress.  Perhaps it is a tight time schedule that motivates you to be more focused to get your work completed. Maybe it is the demands of a test, a presentation, or other performance measure that motivates you to work hard and long hours. Change how you think about the current, overwhelming situation to reduce the feeling of being stressed. Rather than focusing on how much you have to do and how “stressed” you are, shift your focus to viewing the work at hand as a fun challenge, an opportunity, or your good fortune of being in this particular situation at this particular time. Change your perceptions and your stress will subside. Avoid telling yourself anything resembling, “I’m so stressed out. I can’t believe how much I have to do!”

You may face more work than you feel you can possibly complete in the amount of time available. How will you ever get it done? First, you have to begin! To change your perception of a large project into something less overwhelming and more manageable, break it down into smaller, achievable tasks. Then, schedule each of these smaller tasks on your calendar. Determine what specific date you will complete each task; and write it down. Try not to plan so much for one day that you will fail. It is better to plan on doing less than you think you will be able to do than to schedule too much. If you have more time, you can always go to the next day’s tasks and do something in advance. By breaking down a big project into smaller manageable pieces, your perception of the task changes so you will not feel so stressed. When you make the choice to not let the workload create stress, you will be more relaxed. You will be able to achieve more in the same amount of time because your body is not spending energy to deal with all your stress. You will be better able to focus, and you will sleep better. Best of all, you may actually realize you do have time to sleep!

Anytime you are feeling overwhelmed by too much to do in too little time, make a list and schedule each item on your calendar. Once you see it all written out and scheduled, you do not have to continually figure out what to do next and worry if there is enough time to do it all. When you accomplish the tasks scheduled for one day, take some time to relax knowing that there is time scheduled to complete all your obligations. If you are still feeling overwhelmed after scheduling all your tasks, consider the following:

• You may find you need to arrange for new deadlines, scale down on the project, or seek assistance in order to meet the deadlines.
• Look at your calendar far in advance. Consider calling people to negotiate deadlines if necessary. If you have committed to something with a future deadline that you know will be difficult for you to honor without increasing your stress level, change the deadline to a mutually agreeable date.
• If you have committed to too much, determine if there are any commitments you can relinquish. If you choose this option, make sure you relinquish your commitment early enough for someone else to be found to complete those tasks.
• Delegate whatever tasks you can to other people. Remember, there is more than one way to do something. Even if others would complete the task differently than you, let them do whatever they can to help you—and be happy with the result.

Look at your workload as a challenge—not as an oppressive obstacle. By scheduling things ahead of time, you will know there is an abundance of time available to accomplish all that you need to do.  If you find there are things you are unable to fit into your schedule, then perhaps those are things you need to eliminate or delegate. Make your schedule realistic.

Although it may feel like a completely inaccurate statement, tell yourself there is an abundance of time available to complete everything. Even if you don’t believe it, just say it is so. Say this out loud: “There is an abundance of time available to me to complete all I need to do.” Vocalizing this statement helps to counteract your head chatter and thoughts that you don’t have enough time and helps to convince yourself that there is an abundance of time. Try it!!

Leslie Torburn, DPT, is author of the award winning book, Stop the Stress Habit: change your perceptions and improve your health. Read more of Dr. Torburn’s work in her blog. Both her blog and book can be found at www.stopthestresshabit.com.

The following article describes how false or quick forgiveness and underlying anger can be the source of depression. The article demonstrates how Anger Work can alleviate the pain of depression and bring about genuine forgiveness, thus strengthening a relationship.

I agree that forgiveness is an important part of the journey to emotional and spiritual wholeness. However, quick forgiveness is often false forgiveness, and false forgiveness can be detrimental to the health (both mental and physical) of the one who practices it.  In that sense, false forgiveness can be worse than no forgiveness. You can rush yourself into professing forgiveness only to discover later that anger is still sweltering inside of you. Then you may feel guilty for having this anger because you supposedly already forgave that person. Then you engage in all sorts of behavior to try to make it go away.

One of my clients, Bob, reported to me that he was not angry about anything in his life. He had come to me because he just did not want to feel depressed anymore.

After a few sessions with Bob I met with his wife, Karen. I learned that Bob loved to tease Karen. She had had an affair two years earlier and Bob had immediately forgiven her. But shortly thereafter, his teasing of Karen increased and he got depressed. I encouraged Bob not to tease his wife and instead to do Anger Work about the affair. Although he did not feel angry at first, the anger soon came out for it had been lying just under the surface the whole time. It was this unresolved anger that had been motivating his jabs to Karen. He felt good about doing his Anger Work because it made it easier for him to stop teasing Karen. He did not want to shame or hurt his wife anymore. Bob’s depression gradually went away, and their marriage grew closer because he finally got rid of the resentment he had been harboring.

We tend to deal with things the way we were taught to deal with them. Sometimes this teaching comes in the form of overt statements from our role models such as “don’t be mad,” “you have no right to get angry at me,” or “let bygones be bygones.” “Forgive and forget” is another classic favorite. But often the most powerful message is a simple attitude that is learned by example from parents who never express anger themselves. Now that you are grown up and responsible for your own life, it is time to reevaluate the teachings that your family may have passed on to you and make a conscious choice about how you want to handle things.

In Bob’s case, his family had always been big teasers while he was growing up. His mom would tease his dad about drinking too much beer, and his dad would tease his mom about getting fat. No one ever talked openly about what was bothering them. Bob fell into the same pattern without even realizing it. Once he became aware of how destructive his behavior was (eroding Karen’s self-esteem while adding to his own depression) he chose to stop teasing and vent his anger in the form of Anger Work instead.

There is nothing wrong with feeling angry, even for a long time when someone hurts you deeply. Anger is a natural, healthy response to abuse. Still, it is not a good enough reason to become abusive yourself. Your anger is there for a reason. Learn to make it your friend.

Dr. Robert Puff is a licensed clinical psychologist and business consultant who has given hundreds of media interviews, including magazines, online magazines, TV and radio talk shows.  At his web-site, all of Dr. Puff’s writings are free, as e-books and unabridged audio recordings.  If you would like to read or listen to his free numerous selections of how to handle fear, manage anger, reduce stress, go to => www.doctorpuff.com

Get your new, healthy lifestyle off to a great start with these 12 age-defying, stress-busting, heart-strengthening, cancer-busting, energy-boosting and body-slimming Superfoods

All of these Superfoods are easy to find in your supermarket or natural food store. Also, just make sure that they are included and available in your health-promoting kitchen.

Parsnips

Parsnips could be nicknamed the “beauty food” because of the way their nutritional components help strengthen hair and nails and improve skin quality. People who suffer from acne or skin disorders will appreciate the skin-flattering benefits of their unique balance of potassium, phosphorus and vitamin C.

Avocados

Avocados have more protein than any other fruit. Sometimes known as “nature’s butter,” they have only about a quarter of the fat calories contained in the same weight of dairy butter. Ounce for ounce, they also provide more heart-healthy monounsaturated fat, vitamin E, folate, potassium and fiber than other fruits. You can mash avocado on whole grain bread, into baked potatoes and even use it as a hydrating mask. They also exceed other fruits as a source of the powerful antioxidant lutein, which appears to protect arteries from hardening and the eyes from cataracts and macular degeneration.

Pomegranates

This dark red fruit is hot news these days — especially as a juice. Pomegranates are packed full of disease-fighting antioxidants. Some studies suggest that they offer almost three times more than established antioxidant sources such as green tea, red wine, blueberry juice and cranberry juice. They also contain potassium, fiber, vitamin c and niacin, all of which contribute to increased energy and good health, and have been shown to reduce plaque build-up in arteries by up to 44 percent.

Bananas

Monkeys may be wiser than we think — their favorite food is among the most nutritious of tropical fruits. Fiber from green, unripe bananas reduces bad cholesterol and increases the good by as much as 30 percent, while a ripe banana is one of the best ways to soothe an upset stomach. Bananas are a wonderful source of energy, can relieve heartburn and will also help decrease the risk of stroke. And with the possible exception of strawberries, no other fresh fruit is higher in minerals.

Broccoli

Broccoli has almost twice as much protein as steak — 11.2 g per 100 calories compared with only 5.4 g. (Most of the calories in meat come from fat, but the calories in green veggies come from protein.) Broccoli is one of nature’s most potent Superfoods. It has been proved effective against cancer, heart disease and a host of other serious conditions. Its powerful sulforaphane content delivers a double punch to cancer-causing chemicals — destroying any carcinogenic compounds that you have ingested, then creating enzymes that eat up any carcinogens left over from that reaction — and it also contains indole-3-carbinol, which helps your body to metabolize estrogen, potentially warding off breast cancer.

Apples

Eating an apple a day could very well keep the cardiologist away. Current studies suggest that eating apples regularly reduces the risk of stroke and your chances of dying from a heart attack. They lower cholesterol and also appear to decrease the risk of lung cancer. Eating them whole, with the skin on, provides the highest level of nutritional value.

Parsley

This common herb is a powerhouse of the nutrients that rejuvenate and detoxify. Include it when you make fresh juice. Nibble a few leaves when you want your breath to be sweeter. Chop it into salads, soups, sandwiches and pasta dishes. Parsley is also a stress-buster, and studies have shown it to be effective in reducing depression, lowering cholesterol and strengthening kidneys. Many herbalists recommend parsley to relieve the symptoms of rheumatism and PMS.

Cinnamon

This ancient spice (obtained from the bark of Asian evergreens) and highly versatile flavoring helps to relieve bloating and stabilize blood sugar. Cinnamon contains methylhydroxy chalcone polymer (MHCP), which speeds up the processing of sugar in your body. So putting cinnamon sticks in your tea or water, or sprinkling just a tiny amount on desserts, fruits, cereal and into smoothies, will make your insulin release much more efficient, which may slow aging and help ward off diabetes and obesity.

Oats

Inexpensive, readily available and incredibly easy to incorporate into your life, oats contain twice as much protein as brown rice and are an excellent source of complex carbohydrates to maintain your energy levels through the day. They improve your resistance to stress, help to regulate the thyroid, soothe the nervous and digestive systems, reduce cigarette cravings and stabilize blood sugar levels.

Garlic

Herbalists have used garlic to treat all sorts of diseases for thousands of years. As well as being scrumptious, it’s a rich source of the sulphur compounds that keep your body chemistry in balance — fighting infections, slowing down the production of cholesterol and lowering blood pressure. There is even evidence that garlic helps to fight cancer and improves the action of the liver and the gall bladder. Add garlic to your cooking and salad dressings, or roast unpeeled cloves for 40-45 minutes, then peel and mash them into purées and sauces.

Tomatoes

This beautiful low-calorie fruit is jam-packed with nutrients and phytochemicals, which boost the body’s immune defenses. Whether in soups, sauces or salads, tomatoes are rich in vitamins C and B and also contain lots of lycopene, which appears to act as a protective factor against cancer (and may also benefit the heart). Cooked tomatoes contain more lycopene than raw, and most of the nutritional value is contained in the skin, so, ounce for ounce, cherry tomatoes are more nutritious than large ones.

Almonds

Two ounces of almonds give you more than 50 percent of your daily magnesium requirement—a mineral that’s important fro heart health. Eating almonds every day for at least a month has been shown to reduce cholesterol and lower other risk factors for heart disease. A study also suggests that they may reduce the risk of colon cancer. Sprinkle them in salads or grind into pastry.

© Excerpted from Susan’s 3-book healthy eating and living series published by Hay House—The Healing Power of NatureFoods, Health Bliss and Recipes for Health Bliss.

BIO: For more than three decades, Susan Smith Jones, Ph.D., has been one of the world’s most recognizable names and faces in the fields of holistic health and sacred, balanced living. She taught health and fitness at UCLA for 30 years, travels worldwide as a motivational speaker, and is the author of over 25 books, including her latest “healthy eating & lifestyle” books The Healing Power of NatureFoods, Be Healthy~Stay Balanced, Recipes for Health Bliss, The Joy Factor, Herbs: Nature’s Medicine Chest, Choose to Live Peacefully and Health Bliss. To order her books or her audio programs, or to invite her to give a motivational talk to your company or business, please call: 1.800.843.5743 PT or visit: SusanSmithJones.com or SusansRemedies.com.

You can accomplish anything if you do not accept limitations. . .
whatever you make up your mind to do, you can do.
—Paramahansa Yogananda

When I was 17, I learned the secrets to living a vibrantly healthy life, experiencing health bliss, and inviting joy to be my daily default position from my grandmother, Fritzie. At that time in my life, my diet was deplorable. Meat, sweets, and white refined-flour breads were my quotidian pleasures and my health sorely suffered as a result. I was rarely without allergies, and I carried copious amounts of tissues with me everywhere to wipe my runny nose, deal with my sneezing and to take care of all the extra mucus that I was coughing up. It was not a pretty picture and my physician apprised me that I would have to live with this condition forever.

One day when I was visiting with my grandmother, telling her what I learned from my doctor, Fritzie told me that if I followed her healthful guidance and suggestions 100 percent, she guaranteed that not only would my allergies and sinus problems clear up within 30 days, my entire life would also profoundly change for the better: my acne could clear up, my energy would soar, the extra weight I was carrying would fall away, and my attitude would change from hopeless and negative to empowered and positive. Needless to say, she had my attention, and for the next several hours and days (and eventually years), I learned a variety of health practices that—even though they sounded weird and strange at that time—still touched a responsive cord in my heart. That well-known adage, “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear,” was definitely true for me with my grandmother’s loving support. I was ready and my entire life would change for the better because of that wonderful, memorable day with Fritzie—when my new approach to healthy living was engendered.

Along with introducing me to the world of angels and how to maintain a daily connection with my guardian angels and others, she proffered comprehensive guidance on the healing power of natural, plant-based foods; time spent in Nature; and deep breathing, visualization, and meditation. My grandmother also taught me the specifics of taking great care of my body from head to toe (from nasal cleansing, dry skin brushing to slanting and fasting, etc.) so that my body would be better equipped to take great care of me—in other words, how to live a sacred, balanced vibrantly healthy life. (Refer to Susan’s new healthy living books mentioned below for detailed information on healthy foods/recipes and living with vibrancy.)

So my grandmother went from being someone who was strange and weird to me with her “health nut” approach to life, to my greatest mentor (along with Paramahansa Yogananda) and the person who changed my life for the better. Everything that she taught me in those few years before her passing are some of the greatest blessings and life lessons that I still embrace and teach to this day. From her loving guidance, I chose my life career; my passion for alternative and holistic heath care was born. And because of her teachings, I have never taken any prescription medication in my life. Instead, I choose to live close to Nature and listen to my body’s whisperings.

One of the lessons she taught me continuously was that we could all influence our genes and heal our bodies, no matter what health challenge we might be facing. She never believed that old saying that “it’s all in your genes.” She knew that we could heal anything with enough faith, the right diet, and all of the other essential lifestyle choices I write about in my books.

Dr. Dean Ornish would agree, based on one of his latest studies regarding obesity and how lifestyle changes affect gene activity. Children whose parents are obese have a tenfold increased risk of being obese. While obesity in parents sets a predisposition for obesity, it is the combination of food choices, inactivity and genetic tendencies that determine obesity. Can we blame genetics for the problem? On June 16, 2008, Reuters News published an article titled “Healthy Lifestyle Triggers Genetic Changes,” which described a three-month, groundbreaking study lead by Dean Ornish, M.D. It was demonstrated that the subjects affected changes in activity in about 500 genes—including 48 that were turned on and 453 genes that were turned off—as a result of eating more healthful foods, keeping stress levels down, practicing relaxation techniques such as meditation, and exercising regularly. Regarding the study, Dr. Ornish states: “It’s an exciting finding because so often people say, ‘Oh, it’s all in my genes, what can I do?’ Well, it turns out you may be able to do a lot. In just three months, I can change hundreds of my genes simply by changing what I eat and how I live. That’s pretty exciting.”

Fritzie would have loved reading this study and she would have said to me, “See, this is what I taught you right from the beginning, and how glorious that we now have my teachings to you backed by this study.”

The integral foundation of all her teachings centered around two things: 1) self-esteem and how to champion positive self image; 2) stress, what it does to the body, and how to best minimize my stress level when I was feeling overwhelmed by life. For the purposes of this article, I would like to share with you some of her wisdom on self-esteem and then follow up with Fritzie’s teachings on stress and how to manage it well.

Celebrate yourself & champion high self-esteem

Think about how unique, special, and marvelous you are, Fritzie would often say to me. No one else in the world, now or in the past or in the future, is exactly like you. Never, from amongst all the seventy-six billion humans who have walked this planet since the beginning of time, has there been anyone exactly like you. As I thought about this concept recently, I thought about the approximately six billion people living on our planet. Then I figured out how long it would take to count all these people if they passed by me single file, one every second.

Imagine this. A clock ticks out the seconds while you sit in a rocking chair on your front porch. Without taking time out to stretch your legs, eat your meals, or rest your eyes, count each person passing by. How many weeks or months do you think it would take to count the world’s population, one per second? You would have to sit there continuously for about 200 years! By that time you would probably be off your rocker!

This calculation of the world’s population is an amazing lesson in the miraculousness of life. Try to grasp the idea that for 200 years you would never find two people exactly alike. You would never find two whose experiences had been the same or whose fingerprints were alike, or who thought, believed, felt, or talked alike.

And then to that, add the fact that you are the one special being created from one egg and one out of more than 500 million sperm that traveled an immense distance, overcame tremendous obstacles, and won a fierce and challenging competition at the moment of your conception. You are already a winner. What’s more, you are composed of a body, mind, and spirit, and you already have everything you need to live up to your highest potential—to become master of your life. I think that calls for a celebration. You are amazing in who you are and what you can do with your life.

Here’s an uplifting quote from Shakespeare’s Hamlet that I’d like you to memorize and remind yourself of often: “What a piece of work is a man! How noble in reason! How infinite in faculty! In form, and moving, how express and admirable! In action, how like an angel! In apprehension, how like a god! The beauty of the world! The paragon of animals!”

On a universal level, I believe the thing that people wrestle with most in their own lives is low self-esteem. That’s why my grandmother would always talk to me, and everyone who came to see her for holistic health guidance, about keeping self-esteem bolstered. She taught me that when you embrace high self-esteem and live from an empowered presence, you will be successful in all areas of your life. It’s an inner change that needs to be made.

Look at magazine ads, television commercials, or makeover reality shows; either by innuendo or by outright declaration, they are almost all aimed at changing who we are, making us somehow better—smarter, more attractive, slimmer, richer, and more secure. You can spend millions of dollars changing your physical features, but that will do little good until you change your attitude about yourself and cultivate a relationship with yourself that incorporates your very own divinity. When you do that, chances are you’ll be happy with the physical body that God provided for you, and you will establish a salutary health and fitness program to keep your body temple in peak functioning order.

We must choose to be kind and loving toward ourselves—all the time. Self-image is crucial here. Being vibrantly healthy, living fully, and celebrating life starts with celebrating ourselves. Whether we succeed or fail, enjoy our lives or struggle, depends largely on our self-image. In fact, numerous studies have concluded that the view we have of ourselves is the key to taking control of our lives. Develop a loving relationship, a warm friendship with yourself. Be your own best friend. Out of that friendship all your other relationships form. Stop being so critical, judgmental, and unforgiving of yourself. When you are not feeling good about yourself, you feel separated from others and God. When you see yourself as a failure, you create a self-fulfilling prophecy. You attract to yourself that which you believe you deserve. Your negative thoughts and attitudes about yourself, whether they originated within yourself or others, convince you of your inability to succeed.

If you feel you don’t deserve success, prosperity, an enjoyable life, happy relationships, or joy and peace, you will settle for less than that to which you are entitled. When you feel unworthy, you cut yourself off from the fullness of life and create more stress. Put simply, when you learn to love yourself and take loving care of yourself, love will come to you in the forms of happiness, health, success, prosperity, peace, joy, and balance.

Living in such a fast-paced world, constantly in a tizzy over one thing or another, conspires against inner peace. The intense pace and stress of our daily lives can very easily put our peace, joy, urbanity, and health—not to mention our spiritual lives—at risk. It’s easy to get caught up in the whirl of today’s hectic lifestyle—especially if we’ve forgotten the truth of our potential. This leaves us less time for self-fulfillment. Deteriorating standards and values lead to low self-esteem and rob many of us of our dignity.

When we feel an inner emptiness, we are less inclined to make the difficult decisions of life and may be tempted to seek “easy” solutions to problems. This “quick fix” approach to life is understandable, since learning to live fully takes time and patience. But the fact is, we can, and must, slow things down if we ever hope to face our own large and small challenges with aplomb and equanimity, on terms that are our own, guided by our purest hearts. We can choose to experience aliveness and become masters of our lives, keeping in mind that this awakening is always an “inside job.”

In the 1960s, Abraham Maslow wrote his famous book, Toward a Psychology of Being, which helped turn around the emphasis of psychology. Psychology was my undergraduate major at UCLA, and I was drawn to Maslow’s work. Unlike most psychologists of his day, he chose to study high-functioning people—those living their highest potential—rather than people with problems. Maslow developed a psychology of being—not of striving, but arriving; not of trying to get someplace, but living fully. He found a common denominator among all his high-functioning subjects. They all had a vision and were committed to it, believed they had the power to master life, and were self-motivated and didn’t let stress get the best of them. Do you believe you have the power to master life, achieve your goals, and make stress work for you rather than against you?

“Everyone is born a genius, but the process of living de-geniuses them.”

—Buckminster Fuller

Stress — a major problem in modern life

Technological advances have increased the pressure to keep busy, even during leisure hours. We talk on the telephone while we drive, watch television while we read, conduct business while we listen to the radio. We are continually over-stimulated, receiving more information from television, computers, radio, and satellites than our ancestors of several generations ago ever could have imagined! This year alone you will probably make more appointments, meet more people, and go more places than your grandparents did in their entire lives. All this manic rushing around creates a life filled with stress.

Given our current pace, we have little time to relax and cultivate relationships with our spouses, children, friends, and nature. Is it any wonder that stress-related diseases are now on the rise? Some studies even suggest that 80-90 percent of all doctor visits are for stress-related com-plaints. Stress-related illness is implicated in our rapidly escalating health care costs, and health problems attributed to job stress are estimated to cost U.S. businesses $150 billion every year.

I see unrelenting stress as a sickness of epidemic proportions—a “busyness” or “hurry” sickness. But you don’t have to let it overwhelm you as Fritzie would tell me whenever I was stressed out. You can choose to slow down and create a life of balance and joy. Let’s see if you can find any of these signs of “hurry” sickness in your daily life.

1.      Do you eat in a rush, eat while standing or walking, or eat while driving?

2.      Does your busy life prevent you from spending much time at home? And when you finally get home, are you too tired to do much beyond collapse and “veg out” in front of the television?

3.      Do you routinely drive too fast, run yellow lights, constantly change lanes, and jockey for position? Are you impatient with other drivers?

4.      Do you talk fast, have problems communicating how you feel, and lack the time to give emotional support to your family and friends?

5.      Is your life so full of undone chores and responsibilities that relaxing has become almost impossible?

6.      When you’re not doing something productive, do you experience anxiety and guilt?

7.      Have vacations become more trouble than they’re worth?

What causes our need to rush and discount our own physical health needs? We can blame it on economics—and the need to make enough money to pay for our chosen lifestyles. We can blame it on the fact that everything’s moving so fast, and we have to, too. But I believe the real cause is something deeper. By crowding our schedule with “more”—more socializing, more eating, more work, more activity, more appointments—we may be trying to fill the emptiness we feel inside ourselves.

When you constantly direct your attention and energies outward, it’s easy to lose the sense of inner wonder, calmness, balance, and beauty where true happiness, joy, and peace originate as Yogananda emphasizes often in His teachings. By slowing down and redirecting your energies inward, not only will you train your brain to relax, you will begin to reestablish the wholesome sense of self-worth necessary to positively change your life.

Stress is a fact of life

Each of us faces tremendous challenges every day. As we get up each morning, we may face myriad stressors—getting the kids off to school, driving in bumper-to-bumper traffic, presenting a career-making (or career-breaking) report to the boss, balancing the household budget, and so much more. It can seem like there is not enough time in the day to accomplish all you need to do. These are just some of the ways everyday life can get us down. If poorly managed, these challenges can lead to many forms of stress, depression, and anxiety.

What is it that causes the most stress for you? For some of us, our biggest stressors might be weather-related situations such as tornados, earthquakes, floods, fires, and hurricanes. Similarly, for most of us, we get stressed out thinking of deadlines and commitments, but stress has many other causes. It can be triggered by emotions — anger, fear, worry, grief, depression, or even guilt. And stress can actually lead to high blood pressure, heart problems, fatigue, muscle and joint pain, headaches, and other illnesses and chronic health conditions.

You may not be able to change your boss’s tendency to favor weekend workdays or control the bumper-to-bumper traffic to and from work, but you do have access to some powerful stress-busting tools. As a holistic lifestyle coach and counselor for more than thirty years, I’ve worked with thousands of people around the world. I offer my clients the simple, yet essential, choices taught to me by my grandmother to bring purpose, harmony, and vibrant health back into their lives.

Yes, stress may be a fact of modern life, but you don’t have to let it become your way of life. You can become the master of your life, create a lifestyle of vitality and joy, and keep noisome stress to a minimum. The path to contentment is in choosing to have your life in balance. To this day, I honor the wisdom of my grandmother’s teachings—especially when stress seems to closing in. Since feeling stressed out may be something you’re familiar with, I’d like to share with you my seven favorite stress-busters.

7 Sure-Fire Stress Busters

1. Get moving! That’s right — exercise is one of the best ways to reduce stress in your life: it relaxes muscles and eases tension. Want proof? A study at the University of Southern California shows that patients who took a vigorous walk and raised their heart rates to more than 100 beats per minute reduced the tension in their bodies by 20 percent. This effect was greater than a second group of patients who were given a tranquilizer! So go for a walk, hit the gym and do some weight-bearing exercises, or give yoga a try. Studies have shown that those who practice yoga have lower stress hormones than those who don’t.

2. Meditate & Breathe Deeply (really, it’s simple). Don’t worry — you don’t have to be a Buddhist monk to know how to meditate. Here are my grandmother’s simple suggestions on how to do it: find a special, quiet space in your home. Spend at least 15 minutes here first thing in the morning and before going to bed. Sit and close your eyes and focus on your breathing. Inhale and exhale slowly and deeply, focusing on the sound and rhythm of your breathing. Mentally visualize peace and calmness. Your day will start and end on a stress-free note. (For an A-Z guide on how to meditate and how this practice will help you quell stress, look younger, heal your body, and achieve your goals, please refer to Susan’s audio books Choose to Live Peacefully and Wired to Meditate.)

3. Eat a stress-relieving diet. Can what you eat really help relieve stress? You bet. Take stress off your digestive system by eating a high quality, organic, plant-based diet with an emphasis on raw foods as well as fresh produce, which is high in water content and, therefore, easily digestible. Especially beneficial are antioxidant-rich leafy greens, such as romaine lettuce, spinach, Swiss chard, kale, collards and sprouts. Also, choose from an array of colors—a rainbow full of colors with every meal or snack—when it comes to your fruits and vegetables to benefit from a plethora of antioxidants.  Here’s a great way to think of nutritious food: Colorful produce is the most important health care money can buy. And vibrant health starts in the kitchen by choosing to eat your foods as close to the way Nature made them as possible.

I often say in my motivational talks and seminars worldwide that you can sit down to a breakfast of bacon and eggs and butter and then take your cholesterol- and blood-pressure lowering medications. That’s your right. But if you choose to take charge of your body and eat better foods—a healing natural-foods diet—your body will thank you every day for the rest of your life. Studies show that heart disease can be reversed by diet alone. Many diabetic patients can go off their medication by dietary changes. Kidney stones can be prevented as well as cancer and obesity. These findings demonstrate that a good diet is the most powerful weapon we have against disease and sickness. And it comes down to four things: breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks.

Look to nature for the answers on what to eat. You won’t find ice cream trees, potato chip bushes, or donut vines in nature. The more natural a food is, the more likely it is to have an abundance of healthy nutrients that boost immunity, protect your body from disease, and promote youthful vitality. It’s your choice and it’s within your power to create a healthy body and life. (Refer to Susan’s 3-book healthy eating and living series published by Hay House—The Healing Power of NatureFoods, Health Bliss, Recipes for Health Bliss—to learn about the 100 healthiest foods, herbs and spices everyone should be eating; a variety of easy-to-prepare natural-food recipes; and the more detailed information on these seven stress-busters and other salubrious lifestyle choices.)

4. Keep your body hydrated. Our bodies are 70% water. Our cells are 70% water and our planet Earth is 70% water. That’s no coincidence. Each day we need to drink at least 8 glasses of water. At a cellular level, dehydration makes us as droopy as a neglected violet. Lack of moisture in faces causes wrinkles the way lack of moisture in plums causes prunes. Drinking “liquids” won’t do. Although herbal tea, freshly extracted vegetable juice and diluted fruit juice can count in the water tally, coffee, tea, colas, and alcoholic beverages actually dehydrate the body. They’re wet, but they’re not water; in fact, they’re antiwater.

We need to maintain proper fluid balance for brain and kidney function, to rid the body of waste material and toxins, and to maintain radiant health. Water is also a safe, cheap, and effective appetite suppressant. Often when we think we’re hungry, we’re actually thirsty. Get into the habit of carrying a reusable, earth-friendly bottle of water when you walk or drive. If it’s there, you’re more likely to drink it. You can refill them from your filtered or purified water source at home.

5. Catch plenty of Zzzs. Lack of sleep undermines your body’s ability to deal with stress. That’s why it’s important to get 7-8 hours of rest per night. One way to tell if you’re getting enough shuteye is to see if you wake at a regular time without an alarm. If you require a buzzer to out of bed in the morning, you’re not getting enough sleep.

6. Laugh a lot. Worried about something? Maybe you’re stressed out about your relationship with a loved one, the monthly bills that are stacking up, or the poor grades your son or daughter is suddenly bringing home from school. Whatever it is, one way to mollify this stress is to make sure your life is filled with laughter.

According to researchers, laughter releases endorphins into the body that act as natural stress beaters. In fact, a good belly laugh gives your heart muscles a good workout, improves circulation, fills your lungs with oxygen-rich air, clears your respiratory passages, stimulates alertness hormones, helps relieve pain, and counteracts fear, anger, and depression, all of which are linked to illness and stress. So be sure to schedule time into your busy schedule to be with friends and family who make you smile and laugh, and go to movies or read a book that tickles your funny bone. Just make sure you’re getting plenty of things to giggle about in your life.

7. Be thankful—and reap the health benefits. Each and every day, take a moment and be grateful for all you have in life. Gratitude, after all, is a great stress-buster. What you think about consistently brings more of the same into your life. So focusing on the positive, even during difficult times, is the best way to reduce and alleviate stress and transform your life. As my grandmother would repeatedly remind me — Attitude is the mind’s paintbrush; it can color anything.

May your days be filled with health bliss and a sacred, peaceful balance.

© Susan Smith Jones

BIO: For more than three decades, Susan Smith Jones, Ph.D., has been one of the world’s most recognizable names and faces in the fields of holistic health and sacred, balanced living. She taught health and fitness at UCLA for 30 years, travels worldwide as a motivational speaker, and is the author of over 25 books, including her latest “healthy eating & lifestyle” books The Healing Power of NatureFoods, Be Healthy~Stay Balanced, Recipes for Health Bliss, The Joy Factor, Herbs: Nature’s Medicine Chest, Choose to Live Peacefully and Health Bliss. To order her books or her audio programs, or to invite her to give a motivational talk to your company or business, please call: 1.800.843.5743 PT or visit: SusanSmithJones.com or SusansRemedies.com.

When a fellow driver flaunts the laws of the highway, or even forgoes an expected politeness, I never feel the need to smash in his or her face. I’m weird like that. I may chuckle at the offender for being a drooling simpleton, but that’s as far as my violence goes. I tend to apply my personal propensities for brutality only in situations that actually warrant them. I also tend to drive courteously and at the speed limit.

Yes, I’m that moron. I’m the guy you flash your lights at when I spend too long at the speed limit in the left hand lane. I’m the guy you tailgate, honk at, and often target with obscene gestures when I graciously let someone in front of me, and thereby you.

I’ve actually had a girlfriend road rage in the passenger seat with me behind the wheel. Now that was a surreal experience. I honestly didn’t know what to say. The ordinarily demure young lady with whom I’d spent a few pleasant months dating was hanging out of the side window screaming at the fellow in the next car for some technical driving infraction that I had apparently missed the opportunity to comment on.

Luckily, I had electric windows. That didn’t make me the most popular person in the car for the next few miles, let me tell you. And the language! My word…

The key to this problem lies in my opening paragraph; utilitarian mode of transport. That’s all an automobile is. A method to get from A to B. As they’re expensive and because we spend so much time in and on them, we form an unsuitable attachment; we treat them like an extension of ourselves. And as cars isolate and protect us from the outside world they respectively diffuse our personal responsibility and risk assessment; we will say and do things to perfect strangers we would ordinarily balk at. We have no consideration for the potential physical danger we may be putting ourselves in.

There’s no real quick fix for road rage. Managing stress in other areas of our lives can reflect in our driving, however. If our general stress level is lower, a natural fall in aggressive tendencies will likely occur. If we can change our thinking of the driving experience from one of isolation and protection to one of normal social interaction, that would help. Ask yourself, how would you react if someone cut in front of you walking down the sidewalk; would you turn a bright shade of crimson and swing a punch or frown imperceptivity and carry on with your day?

Hopefully you chose the second option. If you did, we need to transpose that reaction from walking to driving. Luckily, our brains can learn by doing. If we force ourselves to behave in a certain way in a given situation, over time our minds naturally adapt and ultimately adopt the novel behavior. Eventually, the feelings of discomfort at behaving in such an unusual fashion diminish, and the behavior becomes imprinted as your natural response.

Psychologists call this process behaviorism. I call it a fine idea.

The joys of ramen were introduced to me during the traditional financial disaster that typically follows college graduation. I learned all sorts of tricks to spice those meals up a bit – I’d buy whole chickens in bulk (very cheap compared to buying boneless, skinless breasts or thighs), roast them four at a time, shred the meat and keep it in a huge bowl in the fridge. I’d boil up my ramen with a few vegetables, and when it was ready I’d drain it, chuck in a handful of pulled chicken with the flavor sand from the sachet, stir it up and voila, a slightly less crap dinner.

I’ll still occasionally revisit the ramen aisle for the sake of nostalgia. I have a fondness for tough times, especially when they’re over. The trick though, is not to get there in the first place.

However, here we are. We’re broke. What do we do now, aside from eat ramen noodles for every meal?

Budget. I know you don’t want to hear it, and I know it’s common sense, and I know you were looking for some magical resolution to your financial crisis, but the first step in the right direction is: budget. Sit down and total your monthly income and outgoings – every penny you make versus every penny you spend. If your income exceeds your outgoings, you’re gold. However, if your outgoings exceeds your income, you are in trouble and need to make immediate changes. Whether it be cutting down on the golf to buying a cheaper house or finding a smaller apartment; something has got to give.

Living on credit is a decidedly American way of life. But being in debt and pushing even further into the red every month is a decidedly stressful way of life and must be turned around. A simple budget plan for each month helps put things in perspective. It not only gives your life a financial framework that helps remind you not to buy things you don‘t need, it also gives you something tangible to focus on, thereby lessening stress.

Stress is heightened by the unknown, and a budget puts you in the know.

Boxing is a great stress reliever for a couple of reasons:

Aggression Release — Boxing gives you a chance to get it out! All of that stress, that anger and the other frustration that has been welling up inside of you all day can be sent right out of your body through your fists when you are boxing.

Cardiovascular Workout — If you take on boxing and practice properly, you are going to get a heck of a workout from it! Getting the blood moving in your veins and getting your body moving on the boxing mat are a great way to get some cardio exercise. You may not know this, but cardiovascular exercise is a proven way to release stress in your body by getting your blood pumping!

Endorphin High — When you are doing a boxing workout, your body is going to be on a fast track to the production of endorphins. The strenuous workout creates lots of endorphins. The chemical release of endorphins gives the body an almost natural high, happiness and positive energy feeling. This is the same kind of chemical reaction that happens in your body when you are excited or have an orgasm. No surprise then that it can lower your stress levels!

So, let’s get to boxing! If this is new for you, start small!

Simple Punch Stress Release

Start with a boxing bag of some sort. These are not that expensive and not too hard to install in your home. You could start with just the little punching bag, a larger heavy bag for your workout to grow with or even a standing bag that’s ready to go once you set it up.

If you are thinking you can go to the gym for this, think again. Every time you are ticked off you may not be near the gym and you need somewhere to let off steam at home.

Start by just punching the bag. Think of the things that are making you angry and stressed and picture the person or thing that is the cause of your stress on that bag. Now wail on it! Really go after it with all of the power and aggression you have inside. If you get a really good punch in you may feel great from this alone.

Want to have a little fun with it? If you’re angry with a person, put a picture of them on the punching back and beat it into submission. Just make sure to take the picture down so they don’t see what you did to them!

Boxing Training

If you really want to do boxing right, why not learn some techniques! Chances are a community college or gym in your area will have classes you can sign up for to make sure you are learning the right technique.

In addition to being able to de-stress with this exercise you will also be able to de-stress as you get focused on the lessons and learning the technique and forget what was riling you up in the first place.

Advanced Boxing Options

If you are in great shape and already know plenty about boxing, maybe you want to play with the big dogs. There are plenty of mixed martial arts (MMA) divisions out there because of the growing popularity of this sport.

This is quite the intense workout and sport as hands, feet and the whole body are involved. Think of it as a winner-takes-all street brawl in a ring. One round in the ring will really get all of that stress and aggression out of your system.

Even if you are not up to jumping in the ring, just watching MMA can be a great stress release as you get into the fight.

So, the next time you are thinking of putting your hand through something because you are so stressed, save your wall another hole and you the time of patching it. Instead focus that aggression into the stress relieving sport of boxing and help your body and mind feel better together.